I felt the summer wind against my arm as I
grabbed the hood. Watched and counted the streetlights feeling closer to God,
feeling alive. We knew every troublemaker in town and nothing was going on that
night. Causing mayhem and exploring the city was what we did. Now, graduated
from high school, my friend Vance and I were exploring what it meant to be
adults. Two years ago we were kids set loose on the world with no direction and
no idea. Tonight, like most nights, we were just looking for an experience. Scott, Vance asked me, what are we doing tonight?
As a kid you'll make friends with anyone. Alex was the kid across the street. From a broken home with an abusive dad and no attention: Alex was a wildcard. Some days we'd sit home and watch movies, play games and other days we'd be outside climbing mausoleums and walking to the waterfront. Sometimes we'd pay and sometimes we'd steal. One particular night Alex called me up on the house phone and told me he wanted to go for a walk. We ended up in the cemetery under the stars.
Ten years old and our parents never worried about kidnapping. My parents had their hands full with my four other siblings.
Ten years old and Alex asks me; does it ever get better?
I had nothing to tell him. I didn't know. I was neglected in my own way with four siblings I could easily get lost in the shuffle. Instead I chose to enjoy my anonymity.
If my parents grounded me I'd spend a week sleeping at friends' houses. I thought I was being rebellious.
I went to school, I didn't do homework. I did the dishes but my room was a mess, you couldn't tell me to clean something that was mine.
One time in middle school Alex, Vince and I were at this new thing called a 'game cafe' and we were playing a demo game that had just come out,Vince mentioned he was thinking of getting the game and Alex said, "Why? You can just steal it." Alex grabbed the disc and darted out the door before we had time to think. Sprinting down the street, an employee yelling after us, it was the most fun I'd had yet in my life. Running down the street with my heart pounding I remember thinking I wanted to be young forever. Young, with my two best friends, there could be no doubt what life was.
Now, at 22, I can say for a fact that I'm made by the friends that I spent those days with. Inside I'm still running down the street from the cafe, still sleeping under the stars.
